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Toy Story 2 was okay.

Xochitl: The Story

This all started last night. My friend, Laura (who also edited this) (blame her for mistakes), was browsing my deviantART profile and read my location: my lair under Mt. Everest. She asked about it. I said, "What? Haven't you heard that story?"
"No," she replied. "Do tell."
And so it began.
(By the way, it's not really supposed to be that great. This was written half in a Facebook chat and half over text. Off the top of my head.)

I was born under a different name. In a different time entirely.
My name...was Xochitl.


(This is the chat portion. It’s not very structured.)

My parents were Mayan. But they were exiled when before I was born.

I had an elder brother, see? But he was killed playing the ball game*.

Because he lost, you know?

Yeah, you know.

My parents tried to stop them from killing him, since he was only a boy.

That, of course, went against everything the game stood for, so they were sent away.

Way up to what is now New Mexico.

It's very different there than the Mayan world.

So they had a guard sort of person take them up north because, you know, they had to make sure they actually went, right?

They came to the civilization of the Mogollon.

No one there really welcomed them at first, since they were exiles. Obviously a little wary.

But they eventually made themselves a home a little out of the way of the village they had come to.

So nature took its course and they had me.

I always felt like I was a bit of a replacement child.

It kind of sucked.

Everyone survived off of their own food, so we never had to have much contact with the locals.

And so... My dad decided to try to establish some trust with the locals.

He joined the hunting party and tried his hardest to catch the biggest mules and trap the best turkeys.

(Speed round!)

So, anyway, when I was grown up more, my mother and I would gather and then my dad died in a hunting accident it was sad.

It was just me and my widowed mother.

But my mother was lonely and had a weak mind and decided to have some relations with a man named Mejakda.

So she was killed and all that.

I was alone then. But I was thirteen, so they just paired me up with this kid Soca.

He was kind of an asshole.

Right, so one day I ran into this crazy woman (which is the name she will go by for the rest of the text).

She never told me her name, so don't ask.

She had all the insane smelling herbs all over the place and one day she told my fortune and told me I would be something great.

So that's cool.

Then one day there was a raid from a nearby village that was low on food because of a fire.

And everybody was running around screaming because, you know, they were shooting people!

So the crazy woman found me and gave me these herbs and told me to eat them or I would die which couldn't happen because they NEEDED me.

So I took them from her and then someone threw a spear at her, so she was dead.

I deliberated for a while, but I decided to take the herb stuff. I passed out

Then I woke up in the woods some distance from the village.

The raid had ended and our village lay in ruins.

(And now we enter the text chain. With paragraphs!)

So, I woke up, but I couldn't move. I could feel my heart beating faster than it should have been especially since I had just been unconscious. It felt like the world was spinning, but I wasn't spinning with it.

I fell back into the darkness. When I awoke again, I could tell that I was not on the ground. I was being carried by strong arms. I eventually got my eyes to focus and looked up. It was my asshole husband Soca! No way, right? He noticed that I was awake and said somewhat awkwardly, "I couldn't just leave you there."
We kind of hated each other.
I mumbled something that was supposed to be a sarcastic thanks, but he didn't hear me because just then an arrow was shot in our direction. It landed mere feet away.

Soca started running, but the arrows were faster. One caught him in the hip and another in the shoulder. The wounds were deep and he could no longer run. He fell to his knees and let me drop to the ground. He told me to go on (Aw, how cliché! Psh. Who was he fooling?). The shock of hitting the ground had woken me up a bit, and I found the strength to start a limping jog away from the direction of the arrows. Still being a tad disoriented, I quickly fell into a ditch created by tree roots. They, apparently, couldn’t see me even though they ran right past me. I lay there, recovering my strength. But soon night fell and I too fell. But into sleep not the Earth or whatever...

So, a few hours later (I supposed) I awoke to a hare jumping the ditch. It was still dark, but for some reason I could see like it was daylight.
I found that I could stand without difficulty and did so. The previous day's events seemed to no longer have an effect on me. In fact, I felt better than I ever had before, albeit a little tired (who could survive on just a few hours of sleep?).

Another rabbit hopped through the leaves behind me. But I hadn't seen it. No, I had heard it first. It sounded as if it had been right in front of me. I concentrated harder. I could hear many things. Many things I could never have heard before. The rustling of the leaves high in the trees, their branches swaying ever so gently in the breeze. I could hear my own breathing, my heart; every function in my body had been amplified a hundred times.

I took a step forward. It felt as if I were floating. I took another, the same feeling. I decided to experiment. I ran as fast as I could through the small forest. I didn't run any faster, but it felt as if it took no more effort that lifting my hand.

This was an exciting discovery. And I decided to use it for my escape. You know me; practicality is first. So, I waited until daylight to figure out my plan of action. I needed rest.

This time the sun woke me up. That and the sound of voices. I, again, wasn't where I had been when I had fallen asleep. I hadn't even been drinking! I mean, come on! I probably had super sleep or something of that sort.

There were three voices around me. Luckily, the owners of the voices had their backs to me. I looked aroud through narrowed eyes, not moving. I didn't want them to know I was awake. It looked like the same kind of hut back in my village, but their pots were of a different style. I hadn't been picked up by my own kind. Which sounds racist, but I'm not, I swear!

As I observed my surroundings, I realized my hands and ankles had been tied. Trussed, if you will. But I wasn't gagged. They wanted me to talk. I turned my attention back to the people in front of me. There was a woman and two men. The woman was young, maybe a few years my elder, and soft spoken. The men were of similar build to each other, but differed in age. One was of the middle-aged variety and the other was very old. The old man was seated; the woman and younger man standing.

From what they were saying, it sounded as if the young woman had been the one to discover me. Unfortunately, she had found me in a bit of a restricted area. Too close to my village. I felt guilt engulf me as they harassed the woman who saved my life. I felt like I had needed saving way too often in the past twenty-four hours.

The younger man then led the girl out of the hut, leaving me, pretending to sleep, with the old man. I had my eyes closed, but I could almost feel his gaze fall on me. There was silence for a long time, until I heard him say, "Do you think you can fool me so easily?"

Uh-oh. He was on to me. This was bad. I kept shtoom and didn't open my eyes.

"Do you think I did not know you were awake? Is that what you thought?" The man was yelling now.

I didn't move, hoping he would get bored with screaming at me and eventually leave. That's what you're supposed to do, right?

I heard his chair creek and his clothing shift, heavy footfalls getting closer. I could hear his breathing and then feel it against my ear. He was so close, his heartbeat was audible to me.

He whispered as if holding himself in check, "Why are you here?"

I didn't answer, but by this time I had started to sweat.

"Answer me!"
His patience was at an end. He stood and kicked me hard in the side. I felt the air rush from my lungs. It didn;t hurt as much as it would have before last night, but it still shocked me. I tried to catch myself as I fell. The cloth on my wrists didn't help this effort; I landed heavily, knocking the air I had recently refilled my lungs with right back out. Even though I was now showing my conscious state, the old man stalked out of the hut.

Unfortunately, he was soon replaced by two very burly men who carried me to the center of the village. Oh, damn. They planned on torturing me, didn't they? I wasn't about to let this happen. I still didn't know the extent of my newfound powers, but I decided to test my strength. I struggled with all my might against my bonds. There were no results at first. But then, the villagers cam into sight. They were looking vicious. A wave of panic overwhelmed my senses. Again, I threw all my strength against the cloth. The sudden release of adrenaline had been enough. I broke free, startling all those around me. Evidently, they hadn't expected anyone like me to come along when they made their trussing materials.

I would like to think I did some epic martial arts move on the men restraining me, but I would be lying to myself. The men dropped me, startled. And then I fell on my face.

Dirt. It does not taste good.

Anyway, I used their temporary paralysis to my advantage. I ran. My head start wasn't great, so they were on my tail for quite a while.

But my endurance was much greater than theirs. I ran what I thought was a sufficient distance from the village. I couldn't see it anymore. Now, survival. That was important. I had to stay out there somehow. Alone. I ran a little further, trying to distance myself from anyone who may still have been after me. Eventually, the sun began to set and I was starving. I caught a few rabbits (I could tire them out, since most mammals don't have much endurance.) and carefully lit a small fire.

Rabbits. Not my favorite.

I sat against the trunk of a tree and hoped I wouldn't be killed for at least a little while.

I continued doing this for a few days. Running, eating, sleeping, and then running again. One day, I was about to stop for the afternoon. The sun was almost setting when I saw smoke. It wasn't too far from me. I felt such relief. Maybe this small civilization wouldn't try to kill me. That'd be nice.

I ran toward it. As I closed in, I could hear the sounds of a throng of people. When I reached the edges, I hunched myself over as to not draw as much attention to myself. I wandered over to a kindly looking woman to ask where the chief was and tried my best to look innocent. She pointed to the hut in the center of the village. I took a deep breath and hoped this one wouldn't be quite as, well, douchey as the last one.

When I walked into the hut I saw a similarly old man and woman. The chief didn't kill me. This was a plus.

(This is when the carpal tunnel set in.)

I told him some sob story about my parents dying that sounded strangely similar to my actual life, elected some pity from his wife, and earned myself a hut that was abandoned and in desperate need of repair. I moved in and wooed some creepy guy so he'd rebuild my house.

I lived in peace in the village for a few months. I made some friends. But then, a new woman came. And we had met before some time ago...

(Space for a commercial interlude?


There we go: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0yNcE8c3j2M)

Well, I'll be damned, I though to myself. It's that crazy woman! Apparently, spear wounds couldn't kill insanity.

Now this worried me. I didn't know if this village knew anything about my home village, but if they did, they couldn't know about my identity. This woman would surely remember me. She said I was important or something like that. Although, I could ask her about my strange powers. And just maybe she was the kind of crazy that wouldn’t tell anyone else about me. The quiet crazy. And she never seemed like a loud person. She had always kept to herself back home... Ah, good enough. I went to meet her.


As expected, the woman recognized me the moment I went to her hut. Of course, she got a good one. She probably did some weird magic on the chief. Psh.


“Ah, yes. Xochitl. I knew we would meet again. We need each other.” This was how I was greeted by her. To tell the truth, I was tired of this clichéd ominous prophecy crap. I wanted some straight talking!


“What is going on?” I demanded.


“What do you mean?” she asked innocently.


“You know exactly what I mean! What are these strange powers I have? Why am I so important? And why are you following me?!”


I was angry now. The woman just sat there very calmly, almost amused.


She spoke. “You must find those answers on your own,” she said, smiling gently.


“Are you serious?! Then what exactly is the point of you following me around?”


The woman shrugged. “Entertainment.”


I was fuming. (Or fumming as it were.)


That woman was a bitch. At this point I realized I still didn’t know her name. Every time I’d been around her, I just hadn’t felt the desire to know. Huh.


But I digress. I began thinking about the questions I had asked her. Apparently, it was up to me to figure them out. Well, the powers had most likely come from those herbs she gave me during the raid n our village. In fact, I was positive of that. On the topic of my importance, I had no idea. I mean, I knew I was pretty awesome. Look at me! I’m practically a Mary Sue! Of course I’m important. But how?


(Laura won’t let me make this a commercial space. So we’ll go with chapter break, mmay? Mmkay.)


Suddenly, I saw a massive shadow coming toward me. It was moving fast. And it had the shape of a bird…


Apparently, analyzing the situation was a horrible idea. The bird swooped toward me while I was reasoning with myself and grabbed me by the shoulders. I kicked against his powerful talons, but to no avail. This thing was huge! I looked up at it. I was pretty sure it was a Roc, which was weird because I always thought those were more of Middle Eastern or European descent… But whatever. I had learned not to question these things anymore.


By this point, I had stopped my thrashing. We were high above the ground and moving quickly. If I somehow managed to free myself now, I would surely plummet to my death.




Enjoy this commercial: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-2kdpAGDu8s)


Well, I didn’t plummet to my death. I just hung there. Being afraid of heights. Yeah, all was good. Then we hit the ocean. Oh, dear lord. That’s heights and deep water combined right there. The roc shifted its grip on me momentarily, and I just about started crying. Although, I was pretty sure the bird wasn’t going to drop me into the ocean. Why would it waste all this meat when it’s got little rocs to feed?


As I pondered about the possible cuteness of baby rocs, I started to be able to see land. Thank God!  Even though I’d probably die faster hitting land versus water…at least I wouldn’t drown!

We flew toward this unfamiliar land. But we didn’t just stop at the shore, oh no! I could see great, white mountain peaks in the distance. As we neared the mountains, we rose in altitude. It was getting colder and colder and harder to breathe. But I hoped my super powers could handle that.


Now I don’t know where rocs are supposed to live, but they sure as hell don’t seem like the kind of birds to like snow. First of all, they’re brown. This one was obviously just insane. Although, I guess they don’t need much protection from predators…


I could see the nest we were headed for. I fully expected to be fed to some nice little rocs, but the nest was empty. The bird dropped me in. The moment I hit the nest, it gave way, and I found myself falling in extreme darkness to an unknown ground below me,


Ahh. I knew there had to be some plummeting somewhere.


I finally landed on something soft. Me eyes (which is how I typed it in the text; I’m a pirate) could hardly see, it was so dark. But faint outlines were visible to me. And I could hear distant dripping. And…footsteps?


I didn’t know if they were coming directly for me, so I decided not to make my presence known quite yet.


The footsteps stopped. I looked around me frantically, trying to figure out where they were coming from. There. To my left I saw the shape of a stout individual. I stayed very still. All of a sudden, a torch flared up in the person’s hand. Damn. So much for staying hidden.


“Ahh. And we meet again.”


Are you kidding me?! It was that damn crazy woman again! And to think I thought she was trying to help me. Next thing I knew she would turn out to be my mother. Psh.


“What in God’s name is happening?” I shouted.

She said, “Did you think I was going to let you get away with that?”

“Away with what?”


“All right. Are you going to stop being a dodgy ass and just tell me? Or do I have to fight you like in the books I’m mashing together to get this story?”

She shrugged. “Well, I’m not going to tell you.”


I was confused to say the least, but I was feeling some serious bloodlust right now. I decided I would fight her anyway. Hey, why not?


“This town ain’t big enough fer the both of us,” I said.


We were off!


-insert battle sequence-


I had her by the throat, hanging over a wide crevasse. I could hear the slapping of water against the walls of the giant tear in the earth.


“Tell me!”



We had been going back and forth like this for the entirety of the fight. It was getting a bit old.

Then she kicked at me and I flipped over her head. She was now the only thing holding me up from falling into the black hole below me, I tried desperately to get a grip on the rock wall with my feet, but it was as smooth as glass. This was it.


“Muahaha. I finally get to see you die!” the crazy woman screeched.

Wow. That was original.


She started to drop me, but I grabbed her wrist and pulled as hard as I could. She started to slide forward, and the combined momentum of our bodies sent us both over the edge. Oh, lovely. More plummeting.


I screamed as I fell, knowing this was the true end. But I felt a certain satisfaction knowing that the crazy woman was going down with me. The second we hit the water, I heard a voice yell, “By the way, you’re here to fight crime!” Then it was lost as my ears were taken by the water.

Thanks. Thanks a lot.


I felt the pressure of the water all around me. I couldn’t breathe. Ah, dying whilst submerged in my greatest fear…


Suddenly, I was pulled out of the water. I was back on the top of the crevasse again. No human could have possibly reached down that far. But I decided not to question the means, for I was alive!

And I apparently had to fight crime now…


But little did I know that when I almost drowned, my soul was split in two. The Mesoamericanness and the powers stayed there, but the sarcasm went elsewhere. And elsewhen.


In 1994, my sarcasm was born as a girl named Stephanie. But I had lost all my memories of being Xochitl. That is, until I was six or seven.


I’ll never forget that day. I was swimming in the sound on vacation when the waves snatched me. Near death experience by drowning. Fun stuff. And when I was pulled back out by my dad, I remembered everything. But something told me not to tell anyone just yet. Not tell anyone…UNTIL NOW.


My Name Is Xochitl

In theaters CHRISTMAS DAY 2010



*The Mayan Ball Game: This game was kind of a cross between soccer and basketball. There were two teams, a ball, and a hoop on each side. The goal was to get the ball through the other team’s hoop. But you couldn’t touch the ball with your feet or hands. The losing team was executed and their skulls were piled up in walls. Gaiety.


So. I finally got a LiveJournal. I kept forgetting to register until today. This is great. Now, I'll just copy my journal entries from devaintART onto here or something...

Ooh! I watched this Aristocats this morning. Damn, I love that movie. I think it's my all time favorite Disney film, topping even Pocahontas. I had completely forgotten about Napoleon and La Fayette and how funny that part was! NOSTALGIA.



Lion King

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